Mind Cup
My mind has been congested by work this week. Not that work is particularly intellectually stimulating. No, quite the opposite really. However it does exact a toll on my ability to string words together in a way that I find interesting or entertaining. Notice, dear reader, I didn’t say “you” because in all likelihood “you” are a figment of my imagination. No, you’re not there but I’m going to keep doing this because it defrosts the synapses frozen into place in the intellectual Arctic that is my profession.
However, I don’t have anything to write about. Sure, I could note that today’s coffee cup was clearly European in origin. It was a 0.4 liter cup for “Campus Suite Coffeeshop Deli & Lounge”. Sounds English so far but then we have the slogan: “Dein Korper dankt” which Google translates as “Your body thanks”. The bottom says Kaffeespezlallat aus Arabica-und Robustabohne which even I could figure probably means that this place only uses Arabica and Robust beans. OK. Right next to that you have the obligatory “Caution: contents hot!” warning in English. The bottom of the cup indicates the manufacture was US Hot Cup, phone number (+49)-89-45125-0. 49 is the country code for Germany. So how the hell did this cup wind up in a coffee cart on the corner of 48th and 6th?
It boggles the mind.
Speaking of minds, did you ever wonder how Google thinks? Let’s put aside for now the philosophical debate over whether the words “mind” and “think” apply to Google. What does it think, or rather what is it programmed to think (because of course only machines are programmed, we human are far superior to that, aren’t we?) I decided what better way to look into Google’s consciousness (another word sure to rile up the humanists) than to ask what it has to say about those seven terms that are in the top-left corner of the screen all the time. Here’s the top result for each.
“Web” sends you to webmd.com, “The leading source for trustworthy and timely health and medical news and information.” Perhaps Google is as concerned about the swine flu as many others seem to be.
“Images” gives you Google Image Search. Cheeky, but image-conscious of them, isn’t it?
“Maps” gives you Google Maps. I sense a potentially boring trend now.
“News” gives you cnn.com. Sorry right-wingers. Fox news is #2 though.
“Video” gives you “news results for video” first. Huh. Didn’t see that coming.
“Gmail”. Guess.
The last term was the most intriguing to me because I had no idea where it might lead. However typing in the word “more” gives you “More Magazine for Women” as the top result. I was sincerely hoping for something more profound or philosophical. Instead I was left with that “Don’t forget to drink your Ovaltine” feeling from “A Christmas Story”.
On further reflection though, I think the feeling evoked by that last result is profound and philosophical. I think that’s an appropriate feeling for the whole web experience.
However, I don’t have anything to write about. Sure, I could note that today’s coffee cup was clearly European in origin. It was a 0.4 liter cup for “Campus Suite Coffeeshop Deli & Lounge”. Sounds English so far but then we have the slogan: “Dein Korper dankt” which Google translates as “Your body thanks”. The bottom says Kaffeespezlallat aus Arabica-und Robustabohne which even I could figure probably means that this place only uses Arabica and Robust beans. OK. Right next to that you have the obligatory “Caution: contents hot!” warning in English. The bottom of the cup indicates the manufacture was US Hot Cup, phone number (+49)-89-45125-0. 49 is the country code for Germany. So how the hell did this cup wind up in a coffee cart on the corner of 48th and 6th?
It boggles the mind.
Speaking of minds, did you ever wonder how Google thinks? Let’s put aside for now the philosophical debate over whether the words “mind” and “think” apply to Google. What does it think, or rather what is it programmed to think (because of course only machines are programmed, we human are far superior to that, aren’t we?) I decided what better way to look into Google’s consciousness (another word sure to rile up the humanists) than to ask what it has to say about those seven terms that are in the top-left corner of the screen all the time. Here’s the top result for each.
“Web” sends you to webmd.com, “The leading source for trustworthy and timely health and medical news and information.” Perhaps Google is as concerned about the swine flu as many others seem to be.
“Images” gives you Google Image Search. Cheeky, but image-conscious of them, isn’t it?
“Maps” gives you Google Maps. I sense a potentially boring trend now.
“News” gives you cnn.com. Sorry right-wingers. Fox news is #2 though.
“Video” gives you “news results for video” first. Huh. Didn’t see that coming.
“Gmail”. Guess.
The last term was the most intriguing to me because I had no idea where it might lead. However typing in the word “more” gives you “More Magazine for Women” as the top result. I was sincerely hoping for something more profound or philosophical. Instead I was left with that “Don’t forget to drink your Ovaltine” feeling from “A Christmas Story”.
On further reflection though, I think the feeling evoked by that last result is profound and philosophical. I think that’s an appropriate feeling for the whole web experience.
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