Advice For An Aspiring Blogger
A friend e-mailed me about blogging and where this friend could find mine. I gave the friend the URL and some advice. Here it is, with some additions. Said friend may read this. Said friend may not. Either future is fine.
"Blogging is so 2006. Nobody does it anymore. And mine is crap, but it's here (with the URL)
You can also subscribe to my twitter feed at that site should you want to be a little contemporary. Oh yeah, and accept my goddamn Facebook friend request already. Nobody is your friend in real life if they're not your friend on Facebook. Didn't you get the memo?
Oh yeah, you should know that there are five good entries on my blog. Unfortunately, there are 410 total entries. Good luck finding the five good ones.
What you don't think I'm gonna tell you, do you?"
Notice the terrible, terrible lies I told this friend. There are now four hundred and eleven entries on this blog, or will be as soon as I hit "publish post" on this and there aren't ANY good entries on here. Five was a number I pulled out of a body part. Notice it wasn't three or forty because that would make me either obsessive-compulsive or religious and as far as I know I am neither, at least not today.
(Why all the commas?)
I also lied about Facebook. There was no memo. Just like there is no instruction manual. I wish there WAS an instruction manual because this thing is too goddamned hard to put together without one. I guess if there was an instruction manual it would be in a language I couldn't understand. Just my luck. Woe is me.
Why do I tell these terrible, terrible lies? Because life would be boring otherwise. And they're entertaining. And there I go with my tic of beginning a sentence with a conjunction. It's all falling apart. Better end before
it
all
crashes and
bur
"Blogging is so 2006. Nobody does it anymore. And mine is crap, but it's here (with the URL)
You can also subscribe to my twitter feed at that site should you want to be a little contemporary. Oh yeah, and accept my goddamn Facebook friend request already. Nobody is your friend in real life if they're not your friend on Facebook. Didn't you get the memo?
Oh yeah, you should know that there are five good entries on my blog. Unfortunately, there are 410 total entries. Good luck finding the five good ones.
What you don't think I'm gonna tell you, do you?"
Notice the terrible, terrible lies I told this friend. There are now four hundred and eleven entries on this blog, or will be as soon as I hit "publish post" on this and there aren't ANY good entries on here. Five was a number I pulled out of a body part. Notice it wasn't three or forty because that would make me either obsessive-compulsive or religious and as far as I know I am neither, at least not today.
(Why all the commas?)
I also lied about Facebook. There was no memo. Just like there is no instruction manual. I wish there WAS an instruction manual because this thing is too goddamned hard to put together without one. I guess if there was an instruction manual it would be in a language I couldn't understand. Just my luck. Woe is me.
Why do I tell these terrible, terrible lies? Because life would be boring otherwise. And they're entertaining. And there I go with my tic of beginning a sentence with a conjunction. It's all falling apart. Better end before
it
all
crashes and
bur
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