Route 44
Sometimes I find myself wondering why I do things. Why I invest time pursuing hobbies I am so obviously unfit to pursue, wasting my time on ventures doomed to failure from the start.
There is a certain perverse pleasure in always being the underdog. I've learned to enjoy knowing that when people watch me trying to accomplish something that they shake their heads and think I'm completely out of place, that I have no business whatsoever doing what I'm doing, that I'm dragging down the level of something they perceive as important and that I perceive as a diversion. It's kind of fun to be perceived as the turd in a punchbowl by a certain type of person.
And while the diversion is amusing, what surrounds the diversion is even more important to me. The preparation, the planning and then the digestion and reflection of what transpired. I even enjoy the woeful head shakes, the polite questioning, the suggestions that maybe I do this or that instead, change the way I do things. I smile and say thanks for the offers but really I don't care. It's perfectly fine for me to keep puttering along the way I have been though it's obvious that fewer and fewer people are willing to play along or pay attention.
So as I've said many times before I'm going to keep banging away at this keyboard, keep stealing my wife's pictures and putting them next to my words when I have no pictures of my own, keep inflicting these data packets on the Internet because it gives me pleasure and ultimately that's all that matters.
There is a certain perverse pleasure in always being the underdog. I've learned to enjoy knowing that when people watch me trying to accomplish something that they shake their heads and think I'm completely out of place, that I have no business whatsoever doing what I'm doing, that I'm dragging down the level of something they perceive as important and that I perceive as a diversion. It's kind of fun to be perceived as the turd in a punchbowl by a certain type of person.
And while the diversion is amusing, what surrounds the diversion is even more important to me. The preparation, the planning and then the digestion and reflection of what transpired. I even enjoy the woeful head shakes, the polite questioning, the suggestions that maybe I do this or that instead, change the way I do things. I smile and say thanks for the offers but really I don't care. It's perfectly fine for me to keep puttering along the way I have been though it's obvious that fewer and fewer people are willing to play along or pay attention.
So as I've said many times before I'm going to keep banging away at this keyboard, keep stealing my wife's pictures and putting them next to my words when I have no pictures of my own, keep inflicting these data packets on the Internet because it gives me pleasure and ultimately that's all that matters.
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